jackie jackie

This one is dedicated to my coworker's mad-crush on the Jaclyn Smith-lookalike, a.k.a. the warm breeze that's blowing thru our office:

i ain't fakin'

Another three four three songs you should like:

NEW COLDPLAY - VIVA LA VIDA (it's awesome!!!) Ah, screw it. Those evil record company people took the audio off youtube, so you have to be more creative and seek this one yourself.


Santogold - LES Artistes


Robyn - Be Mine


Ting Tings - Shut Up And Let Me Go

7 ate 9

Barenaked Ladies doing children's song. Absolutely delightful. Makes me smile!

They told this joke on Regis & Kelly this morning:
"What did zero say to eight?"
"Nice belt."
Hahaha.

it's already may

Still sick. Still wondering how it's already May. Another half of a year gone without much to show for. Life really is like sand slipping thru your fingers. Mandarin class is almost over. Still have not mastered the z words. I still can't keep promises to myself, or to open myself to others. Still aches from October 2006, a dark, dark month in my life. Still remember the good times and still feel betrayed. People are so disappointing, especially when you have expectations. How can you not have expectations, when you become tight with someone? I intend to fulfill my end of the bargain, so why can't others? That scar is not going to heal anytime soon. My faith, what little that I had of it, is now depleted. Expectation is just another form, a more pedestrian form, of hope. Hope is the basis for progress. And progress can never be bad, right? I suppose that's where failures come in, because progress does not come without risk of failures. You hope, you expect, you get disappointed, and life goes on, and on. And that way, another five months are spent in another year. You spend four days sick, you spend a week in a bad mood, you spend two hours watching a crappy dvd, and soon, it's already May. It's already half way done. You look for your pills for temporary relief. Less pain, less noise, less feeling. Just let it wash over you like electromagnetic waves. You become the prism. All the darkness refracted into splintered, broken dreams. You trace your fingers along the dreams, and you find that there is no end point. They just fade away into oblivion. Light and darkness and dreams have no beginning and no end and no borders. They just appear and disappear without announcement, without definition. Sometimes like time, sometimes like people. I am still sick and I think the drugs are not working. I can still feel the cut from October 2006. But what do you do? You do like you always do, get up and go to work and act like a robot and pretend you've got something worth living for and worth waiting for. You practice hope and expectations. Until the next disappointment. Gosh darn it, what a roundabout way of exclaiming, it's already May.

i want my life to make more sense

Three songs you should like -

The Frames - Pavement Tune:


Leonard Cohen - Anthem


Snoop Dogg - Sensual Seduction:

smiley faces

Eeks. There is a serial murdering gang called the Smiley Face Gang that's been killing college men by drowning them and then leaving a painted smiley face at the scene of the crime...Our temporary new boss is a Jaclyn Smith-lookalike, and my coworker is crushing on her big time. He's like skipping around like a school boy in love, fetching her donuts. I think his heart about stopped when, upon receiving a Diet Coke from him, she said to him that she would like to take him back to Kansas City (where she's from) with her. It's actually kinda cute and amusing. I think coming to work has become fun...Mariah Carey marries Nick Canon. WTF? Maybe meltdown #2 is coming soon. Let's hope...Radiohead says it's not gonna give away its stuff for free anymore. Meanwhile, Coldplay is allowing free download of the first single from its new cd. The song's called Violet Hill - and I like it very much...How cool was it that Amanda played the Immunity Idol on Thurs nite and in effect eliminated Alexis? While I would have rather seen diabolical Natalie or manipulative Cherie, I am still happy to see Alexis go. Go, Amanda!...Iron Man is at 90+% fresh on the rottentomatoes meter and grosses over $100M in its opening weekend. It's the first blockbuster of the year. I predict this, Indiana Jones, and Batman will be the big hits of the summer, while Speed Racer and the Hulk will bomb. I like the people involved in Speed Racer and the Hulk but the previews really have not looked good...I've already failed to commit to my shopping ban. Two days into May, I already broke down and bought a North Face polo and pants from REI's latest sale. They were items I have been eyeing for a while. Ugh...Ian McKellen is set to reprise his Gandalf role in the upcoming Hobbits movies. Yay! I can hardly wait (or is that can't hardly wait?) for the day I get to set my butt in a theatre and return to Middle Earth again...Madonna's Roseland set received great press reviews. I thought it was just okay, but then again, it's kinda hard to feel the effect when you are looking at a tiny, blurry rectangle on a computer, with the sound out of sync by a couple of seconds. I did love the 4 Minutes set design though. What is disturbing though is that an early, unconfirmed list of cities that she is touring later this year excludes the Bay Area, which means that I rejoined her fan club for nothing and that for the first time since the Girlie Show, I will be missing a Madonna tour...I have jury duty coming up at end of May. I actually won't mind a small break from work, as long as I don't get stuck on a case with a bunch of dumbasses to decide the fate of some mafia boss...I've been sick for the past few days. Started with a sore throat and escalated to coughing and congestion and slight fever and headache. I took a sick day on Thurs but went to work on Friday. I lasted okay; I actually have a lot to do at work so taking two days off in a row would not have been prudent. I spent Saturday and likely will spend today holed up in my house watching bad movies (The Nines? I like Ryan Reynolds but what a piece of pretentious crap!) and catching up on my Tivo'ed shows (the white teenage girl in me is just loving Gossip Girl - it's just so dreamy and pulpy)...Murakami is having an exhibit at the Brooklyn Museum of Art. It looks really cool. When is that show coming to SF?...I was reading Men's Journal, and when Jeff Bridges was asked the question of how he deals with heartbreaks, he responds with the lyrics from a Leonard Cohen song Anthem that go, Ring the bells that still can ring/Forget your perfect offering/There is a crack in everything/That's how the light gets in. That's freaking brilliant, and inspiring. I spend so much time fretting over the imperfections that I often fail to move past them and just appreciate life and things and people for what they are...Finally, to extend my enjoyment of Once and the Swell Season concert, I found an NPR interview with Glen and Marketa and also a podcast of the concert in D.C. back in 2007. These people really put a smiley face on me.

some things cost more than you realize

All I Need is my favorite song off Radiohead's In Rainbows. This BRILLIANT video is made for MTV Exit (End eXploitation and Trafficking), a campaign to stop the trafficking of children into the sex trade or slave labor. Amen.

One of the reasons I didn't really enjoy Thailand was the bad taste left in my mouth seeing fat, bald, old white men strolling arm in arm with young Thai girls. It's so freaking sad that I don't understand how these men can derive any jolly from the situation. The very fact that men actually do confirms my belief that there is indeed evil in this world. I honestly wish I were some rich guy who would swoop in and save all these young kids and send them to college to become doctors or something. But alas, I am not some rich guy. I am just some bloke who writes about how I feel. Maybe one day, those feelings will cumulate into something worth the world's while.