Of the nine Rebel Heart tracks released so far, here is my ranking:
1. Devil Pray
2. Joan Of Arc
3. Ghosttown
4. Living For Love
5. Hold Tight
6. Iconic
7. Unapologetic Bitch
8. Bitch I'm Madonna
9. Illuminati
Actually Illuminati is the only track I don't care for. All others rank from brilliant/awesome to good. And there are 10 more tracks to come on March 9 (and maybe even a few more bonus tracks).
While the Grammy's performance might not really be one of her most iconic performances, it's an exciting time to be a Madonna fan, with so much new music to enjoy. At the same time, being a Madonna fan is exhausting. She is just so divisive. She always has been. For thirty years now, she's been written off as talentless and slutty. Now, you add in the ageism, and it's infuriating. People want a woman in her fifties to behave a certain way, and when she doesn't, she is considered desperate. What the general masses fail to get is, she's not being desperate; she is being Madonna. She is not your average person. If she were, you wouldn't be talking about her now. She would have disappeared many moons back. Or maybe she wouldn't have even appeared to begin with. Her DNA is just not that of your average human. She has a voracious appetite to push the envelop and to challenge the status quo. She doesn't believe in conventions. You might not like anything she does while she is doing it, but all the while you are hating, she is changing our culture. So I look back and am exceedingly proud that I chose the right one to follow from the beginning. I mean, geez, what if back in the day, I had joined the Cyndi Lauper camp instead. Cyndi Lauper is talented as heck, but come on, my musical idol does not go on Celebrity Apprentice - ok? And if she did, she would win the whole thing and shut Donald Trump down.
Anyways, back to Rebel Heart, I have no idea how this album would go down in her discography. But this era is just starting to get good.
Tuesday, February 10, 2015
Sunday, February 8, 2015
duck boat randomness
Rosie O'Donnell is leaving The View, after she split from her wife. I love Rosie. She should be on her own show instead of having to put up with Whoopi, who acts like a real ass to Rosie on the show. The Rosie O'Donnell show from the 90's was something so joyful to watch everyday...So Madonna got upstaged by MIA's middle finger, and Katy Perry is getting upstaged by the Left Shark. If I were to perform at the Super Bowl, I would do away with any backup dancers or supporting acts. It will be all eyes, and media attention, on me and me alone, thank you...Madonna's matador-themed Living For Love video is out now. I like the video more than Give Me All Your Luvin' and maybe about as much as Girls Gone Wild, but the song itself totally slays. I hope it becomes a hit. Ah, how I miss back in the days when nobody could touch Madonna on the charts. I am so excited for her Grammy's performance tonight...No call or email from GY still, so I guess all that was for nothing. Unless there's some secret message I was supposed to have gotten from it. I just want to say to God that I ain't no Sherlock. If you got something to say to me, you gotta spell it out. These cryptic clues and signs are not going to do it for someone as dense as myself. I need it in skywriting or something along that line...It's raining again, and that means leaks again. I am so worried...I am still enjoying the afterglow of the Patriots win. I just love how the haters are mad now. Yeah, suck it, Trent Dilfer, Chris Collinsworth, Troy Aikman, and all the ex-quarterbacks who were so ready to jump on Tom Brady's back. And Julian Edelman is my new hero. He was instrumental in the Pats' win. He went to Disneyland with Malcolm Butler. And he owned the Pats' victory parade atop the duck boat...I am doing pretty good with controlling my online shopping. So far this year I've only bought some Kind granola bars for cheap, a jigsaw puzzle for my mom to keep her from watching tv all day long (like mother, like son), The Grand Budapest Hotel blu ray for $6, and some Command picture hanging strips. That's not bad for me. Of course, the few dollars I am saving from controlling my shopping are all going to be offset by the cost of expensive house repairs eventually. So like everything else in my life, I feel as if nothing's gained from all the efforts. But whatevs...The lady at my orthotics place is so awesome that she is willing to take a Sunday appointment on her day off to help me get my orthotics faster. So while I bitch about my contractors' shoddy workmanship and customer service, I have to express my gratitude to Paula for going out of her way to help me...Whitney Houston's daughter Bobbi Kristina Brown was found unconscious in her bath last weekend and has been in a medically-induced coma since. Reports coming out do not sound good at all. It's eerily reminiscent of how her mother died three years ago. So sad. The better story would be that celebrity child grows up and makes good, instead of another typical drug addict parent begets drug addict children tragedy...
Monday, February 2, 2015
super monday
Woohoo! The Pats did it. They narrowly escaped tbe Seahawks and won their fourth Super Bowl by 28-24. Brady won his third MVP. Edelman was brilliant and caught everything thrown his way. And the defense saved the day at the very last minute, with a miraculous interception by rookie Macolm Butler. I kinda loved that the three people who are most responsible for the Pats' win were a 6th round draft pick (Brady), a 7th round draft pick (Edelman), and an undrafted rookie (Butler). Each of those people worked really hard and made the most of the opportunity they got. This victory was also extra sweet because everyone maybe other than Boston and I were rooting against the Pats. Now all the haters can stick their deflated footballs up their you-know-where.
My painter came back today and did the touch-ups finally. I am really hoping this is the last time I have to call him back. Granted, the leaks are still there, and we still haven't figured them out. But for now at least, my house actually doesn't look like shit.
I just also found out today that my insurance company is going to cover this item that I need. Last year they refused to authorize it, and I would have had to pay about $5000 out of pocket. But I decided to wait, and then in late December, I decided to give it another go and try the request again, with more medical support. Well, it looks like they are going to say yes this time. That is such a relief. I honestly don't have $5000 to shell out at this point, so I likely would have done without.
So yeah, this is a good Monday. I seriously needed a good Monday. Now that I've had a taste of good news, please, sir, may I have some more?
My painter came back today and did the touch-ups finally. I am really hoping this is the last time I have to call him back. Granted, the leaks are still there, and we still haven't figured them out. But for now at least, my house actually doesn't look like shit.
I just also found out today that my insurance company is going to cover this item that I need. Last year they refused to authorize it, and I would have had to pay about $5000 out of pocket. But I decided to wait, and then in late December, I decided to give it another go and try the request again, with more medical support. Well, it looks like they are going to say yes this time. That is such a relief. I honestly don't have $5000 to shell out at this point, so I likely would have done without.
So yeah, this is a good Monday. I seriously needed a good Monday. Now that I've had a taste of good news, please, sir, may I have some more?
Saturday, January 31, 2015
fate the sequel
Three days later. I guess for once I let myself believe that there is a master plan, but Fate turned out to be a no-show. I am not surprised but still cannot help but be disappointed. I am not sure why the cruel joke on me. Why after all these years open up old wounds? Doesn't Fate know she is dealing with a sensitive soul and a fragile heart? Any further toying and poking might have irreversible consequence. What a bitch she is. She is now just preying on the weak.
The past three days have been really hard. Not only am I once again remembering those years, but that phone call also got me thinking about my future. I think about how GY's life and my life have diverged. He went on and got married to a seemingly smart, successful woman and had two kids. I went on to do nothing but collect more action figures and blu rays. I am past that age where you can be youthfully optimistic about what's to come when you grow up, where the forks of life are still ahead of you. I am afraid that I've already walked down that tine that leads to a dead end with no room to turn around. I've squandered time and opportunities. I spent so much time holed up with my neuroses that I actually ended up feeding them into powerful, hungry, and merciless monsters. I desperately want to make things right, build myself a life worth living. But in all honesty, I haven't a clue how. Sometimes I try to convince myself there is a Hail Mary somewhere. I live too moral of a life and I care too much to be one of those lost souls that the good life forgot. Like in those games, I don't want to be one of those dots that fall down the screen into oblivion, one of those dots nobody bother to catch.
Maybe there still is a master plan but it is slow in revealing itself. Maybe I need to be more patient and let the magic of the universe work itself out. I grow up in a generation craving instant gratification, but you know what they say about a watched pot never boiling. I've been intently staring at that pot for the last two days. Heck, I've been staring at that pot for decades now. Screw you, pot. Screw you, Fate.
Oh by the way - Go Pats!!!
The past three days have been really hard. Not only am I once again remembering those years, but that phone call also got me thinking about my future. I think about how GY's life and my life have diverged. He went on and got married to a seemingly smart, successful woman and had two kids. I went on to do nothing but collect more action figures and blu rays. I am past that age where you can be youthfully optimistic about what's to come when you grow up, where the forks of life are still ahead of you. I am afraid that I've already walked down that tine that leads to a dead end with no room to turn around. I've squandered time and opportunities. I spent so much time holed up with my neuroses that I actually ended up feeding them into powerful, hungry, and merciless monsters. I desperately want to make things right, build myself a life worth living. But in all honesty, I haven't a clue how. Sometimes I try to convince myself there is a Hail Mary somewhere. I live too moral of a life and I care too much to be one of those lost souls that the good life forgot. Like in those games, I don't want to be one of those dots that fall down the screen into oblivion, one of those dots nobody bother to catch.
Maybe there still is a master plan but it is slow in revealing itself. Maybe I need to be more patient and let the magic of the universe work itself out. I grow up in a generation craving instant gratification, but you know what they say about a watched pot never boiling. I've been intently staring at that pot for the last two days. Heck, I've been staring at that pot for decades now. Screw you, pot. Screw you, Fate.
Oh by the way - Go Pats!!!
Wednesday, January 28, 2015
fate
The weirdest thing occurred to me today. I typically don't have stories to tell, but today I've got one.
Back in the mid-2000's, I had a close friend named GY. I thought of him like a brother. I supported him in any way I could. I can for certain say I was the best friend I could be. I listened to his constant girlfriend problems. I encouraged him when he was trying to find a job after getting his MBA. We talked on the phone all the time, went out to dinner and lunch and movies and even on a memorable month-long trip. He was a pretty important person to me back in the day. But then we fell out. I have no idea how or why. All I know is that the last couple of times we talked, he was behaving very differently. And then there was nothing. This was about seven years ago. I still think of him and our friendship often. There was no real closure. I was always left wondering what the hell happened, what did I do. Being who I am, I always think I did something, so for the past seven years, I still beat myself up. For what specifically? I don't know. When I say that life happens in small moments, I mean it. In fact, in this case, life happened in a moment so small that I didn't even realize it, and I lost a friend, a friend that I held in the highest esteem, in the process.
Flash forward to today. I was sitting in the office this afternoon. My office phone rang. As usual, I looked at the caller ID before I picked up the phone. The number I didn't recognize, but the name that flashed across was that name - GY. I froze. I was so shocked that I didn't pick up the phone. The call went to voicemail. I then went to retrieve the message, and it was a message left by an attorney who needed to talk to me about a work issue. The number she left me was a different number from the caller ID number. I returned her call, and took care of the work issue. Then before we hung up, I asked her about the caller ID name. She said that her kid was sick, so she was working from home and calling from her land line. The name was her husband's name. I told her that's funny because I used to know someone by that name but I haven't talked to this person in a long time. Then we started comparing notes. Yup he went to UC Irvine. Yup his brother has an unusual name. Yup he likes rock climbing and worked at REI at one point. Yup her husband is in fact this person I used to know. My mind was just blown.
I mean, I am not sure I have had many instances in my life that I can attribute to fate and divine intervention. But I have to admit - this was rather freaky. If the attorney's kid did not get sick, and she did not choose to call me from her land line today, this call would have just been a typical work call. Another ten minutes in my stressful day. But something happened that led her to call me with that phone with that particular caller ID.
So, in the seven years, he met this girl, got married, had two kids (boy and girl). They live just across the park from me, like less than ten minutes away. His mother is fine (she had cancer before).
I told her to tell him hello for me.
Now I spent the rest of the day wondering whether he would take this as a sign that he owes me an explanation. I hope that he would call and I finally can understand what happened. But I highly doubt it, knowing the type of person he is and the way things ended. I think people like him don't really know how much they can hurt other people by their actions. They just go around life more focused on themselves. That didn't make me think less of him when we were friends, but now I need to understand I shouldn't have any expectation that the end of the friendship meant nearly as much to him as it did to me. Likely to him, I was just another dude he once knew, some guy he hung out with for a few years.
But if that was it, then what was the point of this fateful turn of event? I don't know. Life is a mystery indeed.
Back in the mid-2000's, I had a close friend named GY. I thought of him like a brother. I supported him in any way I could. I can for certain say I was the best friend I could be. I listened to his constant girlfriend problems. I encouraged him when he was trying to find a job after getting his MBA. We talked on the phone all the time, went out to dinner and lunch and movies and even on a memorable month-long trip. He was a pretty important person to me back in the day. But then we fell out. I have no idea how or why. All I know is that the last couple of times we talked, he was behaving very differently. And then there was nothing. This was about seven years ago. I still think of him and our friendship often. There was no real closure. I was always left wondering what the hell happened, what did I do. Being who I am, I always think I did something, so for the past seven years, I still beat myself up. For what specifically? I don't know. When I say that life happens in small moments, I mean it. In fact, in this case, life happened in a moment so small that I didn't even realize it, and I lost a friend, a friend that I held in the highest esteem, in the process.
Flash forward to today. I was sitting in the office this afternoon. My office phone rang. As usual, I looked at the caller ID before I picked up the phone. The number I didn't recognize, but the name that flashed across was that name - GY. I froze. I was so shocked that I didn't pick up the phone. The call went to voicemail. I then went to retrieve the message, and it was a message left by an attorney who needed to talk to me about a work issue. The number she left me was a different number from the caller ID number. I returned her call, and took care of the work issue. Then before we hung up, I asked her about the caller ID name. She said that her kid was sick, so she was working from home and calling from her land line. The name was her husband's name. I told her that's funny because I used to know someone by that name but I haven't talked to this person in a long time. Then we started comparing notes. Yup he went to UC Irvine. Yup his brother has an unusual name. Yup he likes rock climbing and worked at REI at one point. Yup her husband is in fact this person I used to know. My mind was just blown.
I mean, I am not sure I have had many instances in my life that I can attribute to fate and divine intervention. But I have to admit - this was rather freaky. If the attorney's kid did not get sick, and she did not choose to call me from her land line today, this call would have just been a typical work call. Another ten minutes in my stressful day. But something happened that led her to call me with that phone with that particular caller ID.
So, in the seven years, he met this girl, got married, had two kids (boy and girl). They live just across the park from me, like less than ten minutes away. His mother is fine (she had cancer before).
I told her to tell him hello for me.
Now I spent the rest of the day wondering whether he would take this as a sign that he owes me an explanation. I hope that he would call and I finally can understand what happened. But I highly doubt it, knowing the type of person he is and the way things ended. I think people like him don't really know how much they can hurt other people by their actions. They just go around life more focused on themselves. That didn't make me think less of him when we were friends, but now I need to understand I shouldn't have any expectation that the end of the friendship meant nearly as much to him as it did to me. Likely to him, I was just another dude he once knew, some guy he hung out with for a few years.
But if that was it, then what was the point of this fateful turn of event? I don't know. Life is a mystery indeed.
Monday, January 19, 2015
je suis
I am:
- Fed up: What's with all the people behaving badly? I got yelled at twice in the last three weeks on Noriega Street over car situation. One was when I sat in a parked car and some guy was waiting for me to leave, and when I didn't, he came up and pounded on my window and started cussing at me. Apparently he said my tail lights were on, when I didn't think they were. Another was today when this truck did a U to double park and was trying to back up. I at around the same time pulled up to pick up my mother from the front of a restaurant. Apparently I got in his way and he got out of his truck to scream at me. So I was supposed to know how far he was going to back up??? I mean, neither of these instances were my fault, but even if it were, why do people feel the need to act so fucking rude? I mean, if a car you thought was leaving a space wasn't, just go find another damn space. That happens to me all the time. If you need to wait twenty seconds for an elderly person to get into a car before you can back up, just wait. Is that such a big fucking deal?
- Ecstatic: The Pats are going back to the Super Bowl. It's gonna be Tom Brady's 6th time. This time he has Gronk and Julian Edelman and a pretty solid defense.
- Nervous: But the Pats are playing against the Seahawks, who are pretty formidable.
- Annoyed: By the Pats haters. Now there's some random accusation about the Pats deflating the footballs before yesterday's game. Whatevs.
- More annoyed: By Madonna haters. Her new song Living For Love is her best in ages, but I don't think it's gonna get much traction on the radio because people are ageist. They wouldn't think it's cool to like a pop song by a 56-year-old woman. And yes, every article about Madonna cites her age. Why???
- Hopeful: That Boyhood will win Best Picture and Best Director at the Oscars this year. For me, it's not only because Boyhood on its own is a great movie, but I also think it makes up for the lack of Oscar love that the Before Sunrise series got. Richard Linklater deserves all the accolades. But then I am keeping my optimism in check because there is a late surge for Selma and American Sniper - two more "important" films. I am really not a fan of "important" films.
- Impatient: Come on, painter guy and door guy. I need y'all to come back and get things corrected already. It's mid-January for Christ's sake.
- Disappointed: I waited 15 years for the chance to retake my terrible driver's license photo. Well the new one is downright horrific. Those DMV photographers can join painters and contractors on my list of "people who suck at their jobs and/or take no pride in their workmanship." I mean, I am not asking for Justin Bieber Calvin Klein ad photoshopping, but come on!
- Charlie: Actually I am not. Those people fight the good fight for their art. I would be too scared. If you threaten my life for a cartoon I am drawing, I can pretty much tell you I would stop drawing that cartoon. I am being honest. I am not that brave. I supposed that there are some things even I would sacrifice my life for, but surely my "art" is not one of those things. So good for Charlie Hebdo and all the people who aren't afraid to stand up for things they believe in. We need those people in this world to make up for people like me, ordinary folks with ordinary cojones.
- Fed up: What's with all the people behaving badly? I got yelled at twice in the last three weeks on Noriega Street over car situation. One was when I sat in a parked car and some guy was waiting for me to leave, and when I didn't, he came up and pounded on my window and started cussing at me. Apparently he said my tail lights were on, when I didn't think they were. Another was today when this truck did a U to double park and was trying to back up. I at around the same time pulled up to pick up my mother from the front of a restaurant. Apparently I got in his way and he got out of his truck to scream at me. So I was supposed to know how far he was going to back up??? I mean, neither of these instances were my fault, but even if it were, why do people feel the need to act so fucking rude? I mean, if a car you thought was leaving a space wasn't, just go find another damn space. That happens to me all the time. If you need to wait twenty seconds for an elderly person to get into a car before you can back up, just wait. Is that such a big fucking deal?
- Ecstatic: The Pats are going back to the Super Bowl. It's gonna be Tom Brady's 6th time. This time he has Gronk and Julian Edelman and a pretty solid defense.
- Nervous: But the Pats are playing against the Seahawks, who are pretty formidable.
- Annoyed: By the Pats haters. Now there's some random accusation about the Pats deflating the footballs before yesterday's game. Whatevs.
- More annoyed: By Madonna haters. Her new song Living For Love is her best in ages, but I don't think it's gonna get much traction on the radio because people are ageist. They wouldn't think it's cool to like a pop song by a 56-year-old woman. And yes, every article about Madonna cites her age. Why???
- Hopeful: That Boyhood will win Best Picture and Best Director at the Oscars this year. For me, it's not only because Boyhood on its own is a great movie, but I also think it makes up for the lack of Oscar love that the Before Sunrise series got. Richard Linklater deserves all the accolades. But then I am keeping my optimism in check because there is a late surge for Selma and American Sniper - two more "important" films. I am really not a fan of "important" films.
- Impatient: Come on, painter guy and door guy. I need y'all to come back and get things corrected already. It's mid-January for Christ's sake.
- Disappointed: I waited 15 years for the chance to retake my terrible driver's license photo. Well the new one is downright horrific. Those DMV photographers can join painters and contractors on my list of "people who suck at their jobs and/or take no pride in their workmanship." I mean, I am not asking for Justin Bieber Calvin Klein ad photoshopping, but come on!
- Charlie: Actually I am not. Those people fight the good fight for their art. I would be too scared. If you threaten my life for a cartoon I am drawing, I can pretty much tell you I would stop drawing that cartoon. I am being honest. I am not that brave. I supposed that there are some things even I would sacrifice my life for, but surely my "art" is not one of those things. So good for Charlie Hebdo and all the people who aren't afraid to stand up for things they believe in. We need those people in this world to make up for people like me, ordinary folks with ordinary cojones.
Sunday, January 18, 2015
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