I am a man of inventory. I like to constantly take stock of myself, my life, my world. My latest list is a top ten list of my greatest FEARS.
Let me start off by admitting that I am a chicken. I am scared of many, many things. Sometimes I wonder how I get by in life, with some many fears. But then I remember this quote that says courage is not about not having fear, but it's about doing things despite your fear. In which case, I am a hell of a courageous dude!
10. Talking apes (those damn Planet of the Apes creatures really freak me out)
9. Ghosts (way scarier than serial killers!)
8. Eternal damnation (yeah, all those Jehovah's Witnesses and Christians have scared the bejesus out of me, yet I continue to sin and carry on like a heathen - how courageous of me!)
7. Rodents (it's the fur and the claws - why else do you suppose Mickey wears gloves?)
6. Making mistakes (I know, I know about that thing where you grow through your mistakes, but honestly I am not sure if the lessons are worth the hassle)
5. Cancer (I am a hypochondriac; I think I have every illness and ailment out there - cancer seems to be the most mysterious, thus scariest, of them all)
4. Baldness (oh hair, how I love you so! Would you please be mine forever and ever?)
3. Air turbulence while flying (the absolute worst part of going on holiday)
2. Something bad happening to my mother (especially when I hear her walking down stairs)
1. EARTHQUAKE!!!
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