fate

The weirdest thing occurred to me today.  I typically don't have stories to tell, but today I've got one.

Back in the mid-2000's, I had a close friend named GY.  I thought of him like a brother.  I supported him in any way I could.  I can for certain say I was the best friend I could be.  I listened to his constant girlfriend problems.  I encouraged him when he was trying to find a job after getting his MBA.  We talked on the phone all the time, went out to dinner and lunch and movies and even on a memorable month-long trip.  He was a pretty important person to me back in the day.  But then we fell out.  I have no idea how or why.  All I know is that the last couple of times we talked, he was behaving very differently.  And then there was nothing.  This was about seven years ago.  I still think of him and our friendship often.  There was no real closure. I was always left wondering what the hell happened, what did I do.  Being who I am, I always think I did something, so for the past seven years, I still beat myself up.  For what specifically?  I don't know.  When I say that life happens in small moments, I mean it.  In fact, in this case, life happened in a moment so small that I didn't even realize it, and I lost a friend, a friend that I held in the highest esteem, in the process.

Flash forward to today.  I was sitting in the office this afternoon.  My office phone rang.  As usual, I looked at the caller ID before I picked up the phone.  The number I didn't recognize, but the name that flashed across was that name - GY.  I froze. I was so shocked that I didn't pick up the phone.  The call went to voicemail.  I then went to retrieve the message, and it was a message left by an attorney who needed to talk to me about a work issue.  The number she left me was a different number from the caller ID number.  I returned her call, and took care of the work issue.  Then before we hung up, I asked her about the caller ID name.  She said that her kid was sick, so she was working from home and calling from her land line.  The name was her husband's name.  I told her that's funny because I used to know someone by that name but I haven't talked to this person in a long time.  Then we started comparing notes.  Yup he went to UC Irvine.  Yup his brother has an unusual name.  Yup he likes rock climbing and worked at REI at one point.  Yup her husband is in fact this person I used to know.  My mind was just blown.

I mean, I am not sure I have had many instances in my life that I can attribute to fate and divine intervention.  But I have to admit - this was rather freaky.  If the attorney's kid did not get sick, and she did not choose to call me from her land line today, this call would have just been a typical work call.  Another ten minutes in my stressful day.  But something happened that led her to call me with that phone with that particular caller ID.

So, in the seven years, he met this girl, got married, had two kids (boy and girl).  They live just across the park from me, like less than ten minutes away.  His mother is fine (she had cancer before).

I told her to tell him hello for me.

Now I spent the rest of the day wondering whether he would take this as a sign that he owes me an explanation.  I hope that he would call and I finally can understand what happened.  But I highly doubt it, knowing the type of person he is and the way things ended.  I think people like him don't really know how much they can hurt other people by their actions.  They just go around life more focused on themselves.  That didn't make me think less of him when we were friends, but now I need to understand I shouldn't have any expectation that the end of the friendship meant nearly as much to him as it did to me.  Likely to him, I was just another dude he once knew, some guy he hung out with for a few years.

But if that was it, then what was the point of this fateful turn of event?  I don't know.  Life is a mystery indeed.